Then
there are those whose mothers are alive but were never invested in their child’s
life. The adult child has no reason to shower flowers and bathrobes on a woman
who never seemed to care.
There’s
the moms who weren’t born into that role but gladly took on mom
responsibilities and love their children with all their heart.
And
let’s not forget dads who step in for moms due to circumstances beyond their
control. They learn to braid hair, console a broken heart and find out the best
place to get a mani or pedi when their girl’s having a tough week.
Throughout
the ages, women have struggled to be the perfect mom. Many moms of the 1970s
and 1980s tried to balance the home
front and an out-of-the-house job. Most of the time, we succeeded, but there
were quite a few fast-food dinners at the ball park we probably regret.
Moms
of the 1990s bought into the theory that we could have a pre-dawn exercise
routine, hold down high-powered jobs, enroll 2.5 children on every soccer,
baseball, softball, yoga and swimming team within 50 miles of our house and still
get our exhausted family in the minivan for a happy ride into the sunset.
Some
moms of the 2000’s are trying to be like Beyonce or Princess Kate, both of whom
seemed to drop the baby weight like we drop a Hot Pocket snagged out of the
microwave.
We
still haven’t grasped the reality that the best moms have their own style. They
rear their offspring with a firm hand and a loving heart. They’re always a mom,
whether they’re wearing designer jeans, sweat pants, on crutches, in a
wheelchair or washing your dirty laundry.
Moms
never eat the last piece of pizza or the last scoop of vanilla ice cream. In
fact, the word “last” figures high in their vocabulary – they’re the last ones to
turn off the lights in a child’s bedroom and the last one out of the kitchen at
night.
So
what do moms want on Mother’s Day? To hear their child’s voice, whether they’re
5 or 60 years old. Remember, this is the voice that called out to them in the
middle of the night and yelled in triumph after catching a lizard in the flower
bed.
This
is the voice that telephoned for rides after they missed the bus, asked a
thousand times if they had any clean underwear and, at least a million times,
asked if there was anything to eat.
There
are moms who would give anything to hear their child’s voice just one more
time, and every person’s heart breaks for that parent.
And
there are “those voices,” the whiney ones that swore their lives were ruined
because we were too strict or wouldn’t let them wear makeup or short skirts.
Kids,
I’ll tell you a secret. Moms will tell you they don’t remember that voice. They
only remember the way your voice sounded when they tucked you in at night and
you whispered “Sleep next to me, mommy, so I feel safe.”
On
this Mother’s Day, remember it’s not the expensive gifts, lunch at a fancy
restaurant or a new bathrobe that’ll make your mother happy. It’s your voice she
wants to hear.
So call,
just to say you love her, and remind her that, at this point in time, you’ll be
the one to keep her safe.
This column was originally published in The Fort Bend Herald.
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